Anger...

Anger.  A very strong emotion that can make you or break you.  I'm very angry today and I really don't know why.  There is nothing wrong with my day and no one has done anything to make me angry so why am I so mad?

Let me make some lunch and I will explore this...

It's All So Basic...

If you really think about it, it's all basic.  To save money - you just don't spend, to quit smoking - you just don't light up, to lose weight - you just - hmmm, that's where it get complicated.  Or so it seems.

To lose weight you must use more calories than you consume, right?  Right.  So, for me to lose weight I have to eat less and exercise more.  But how do I do that?  How can I get happy with myself?  By making one change a day.

Today I walked on the treadmill for about 20 minutes and then danced for 25 minutes.  That was fun.  But, on a daily basis, do I have time to do that EVERY DAY?  I don't have a choice.  Well, I do but you know what I mean.

So, for getting back to the basics of this...yesterday at the daycare I put in a DVD for the little ones to watch.  As I watched and sang along I realized that it really is basic!  I can do "Elmocize" with the kids and get at least 30 minutes of exercise at the daycare and then do the dance and treadmill at night when I'm at home.

Hooray for Elmocize!!!

So, I think this is going to be cute and fun and maybe, just maybe, I can lose the 55 pounds that I need to lose.

Happy Easter!

Today is Easter Sunday.  What a beautiful day it is! The sun is shinning and it's about 76 degrees...perfect weather for an egg hunt.  Except for one thing - my little man has strep throat again!  He's not much up to an egg hunt.  But he did dye the eggs!

He was upset about the cracked on but I told him, "Son, there's a cracked one in every family!"

He did want to go out and hunt some but he got tired quickly...

Gator and Millie found an egg too!

When he got tired of hunting eggs he wanted to blow bubbles.

I love my little sunshine!

Dinner will be ready soon and we will enjoy dinner as a family.  I know that my life is far from perfect but, to me, it IS perfect!

He's Growing Up!

Sean lost his first tooth!!!!

He was so proud! Mom was also very proud and then sad as well.  My little boy is officially no longer a baby!  When that first baby tooth comes out, he's a big boy.  That happened today, March 31, 2012.

And then....

That's right! Tooth number two came out!  About two hours after the first tooth was pulled he said, "Mom, I think this one is ready too but I'm scared!"  We pulled it!  So he lost his first two baby teeth on the same day!

The tooth fairy came and left a cut little note.  It said,

"Sean,

While you lay sleeping, I came in the night.

Under your pillow was a marvelous sight.

Your first two teeth had some unstuck.

Keep them forever, they will bring you good luck!

Love,

The Tooth Fairy

3-31-12"

I'm so happy for him and I'm so happy to be here to celebrate this day with him!

Hmmm...

I can't believe I haven't written in a month!  I'm bad and I know it!

Tomorrow is 91 days, 3 months since my heart attack and my Quit!  I'm so proud of myself.

I had my follow up at the cardiologist office.  He said I'm doing fine and he will see me in three months.  My goal is to have lost at least 15 pounds by then.

Anyway, off to bed for tonight.  I will try to do better!

I'm looking better!

Two Months...

...that's how long I've been quit smoking!  It's funny, I don't say, "It has been two months since my heart attack." but "two months since I quit smoking".  The two go hand in hand.  It has been two months since I had a heart attack and two months since I quit smoking.  I can't believe it!  I am so proud of me!  On the Quitnet site you design a T-shirt on your two month anniversary - it's a virtual shirt of course.  I designed mine this morning and then went to Cafepress to order one I had seen.  The one I liked, and ordered, says, "You can't scare me, I quit smoking cold turkey."  Well, you could also design your own T-shirt!!!!  How awesome is that!  Yes, I designed one and ordered it!  It is pink and on the front it has three things - An "I Quit" cigarette ribbon, then N.O.P.E. in green letters and then a heart.  N.O.P.E stands for Not One Puff Ever.  On the back, in the same green letters it simply says, "DFS" which is the easiest way to quit smoking, "Don't Fucking Smoke".  I can't wait until it or they get here!

Anyway, off to do some grocery shopping.  Later all!

N.O.P.E

These are the designs but the word is in the middle.

Thank You God!

The test results were good! Or as good as they can get - the nodule is unchanged and unspecified and my doctor says that's good, no cancer.  Follow up in 6 months.  Sooooo....

With all that behind me and the future looking better I'm getting started on my way to good health!  I will be eating right, exercising, not smoking - did I mention that it has been 56 days since I had a cigarette? - and doing better on everything.  I've managed to "lose myself" and I'm going to find me again.  I know I'm in there, just gotta get me back out.

So, I will lose 50 pounds, yes 50!  I will eat healthy and control my diabetes.  I will, for this week, walk on the treadmill for 10 minutes every day and dance for 20 minutes every day.  That's my cardio work out.  I will drink at least one bottle of water every day (hey, that's a lot for me) and cut back on my coffee.  I won't stop by McDonalds and get sweet tea daily - if I go I will get unsweet tea.

There is a person on the Quitnet that is an inspiration to me.  Her screen name on the quit CarlyKicksButts and she is just amazing! I've been reading her blog http://thenextrightchoice.blogspot.com/ and the way she is doing things and it has given me some ideas.  I know that I can do this and I will.  Her blog is about the "next right choice" and that's what getting healthy is about - making the next right choice.

I know it won't all happen overnight and it will take hard work.  It's about the hard work, and the end result but it's also about the journey and this is the journey through my eyes.